When you have realized that your stress and daily challenges have gotten to the point where you recognize that it is time to ask for help, you might not know where to begin.

In starting the journey to starting therapy, I frequently hear how hard it is for people to find a therapist they can trust, who accepts their insurance or has affordable private pay rates and is available to meet when they are.

As someone who may be experiencing a mental health concern, sifting through endless information on your own can feel overwhelming.

I wanted to create a guide to help alleviate some of these challenges for you, so you can move from realizing you need help to finding a helpful, skilled therapist who “gets you” more easily.

Starting the Search for a Therapist

Here are some of the most common ways to find a therapist near you.

Call Your Insurance Company

It’s always good to call your insurance company to find out what your benefits are, if you have a co-pay, if you need a referral for therapy, how many sessions are covered under your plan, etc.

Your insurance company should keep a list of therapists who accept your insurance and are open to taking on new clients. They can provide you with information on how to contact them.

Insurance companies may also have information on local support groups and active mental wellness programs that they can point you towards.

Ask Around

Word-of-mouth is one of the best ways to find a reputable therapist in your area because your loved ones are not pressured in any way to give you anything other than honest feedback.

Talk to your friends, family members, neighbors, co-workers, or even the girl at the salon who does your hair about therapists they know in the community.

Even better—if they have a therapist themselves, ask them what they like or dislike about their therapist, what kind of area are they trained in, if they accept insurance, or if they would recommend them to someone else.

If you are seeing a doctor, nurse practitioner, psychiatrist, or another specialist, ask them for recommendations on good therapists in the area who specialize in what you are looking for.

You can even ask members of your clergy for information and recommendations. They receive training to provide faith-based counseling.

Local Resources

Check with your local community centers, libraries, and advocacy centers for more information. If you’re not sure what is available, look up things like “LGBT center” and it will bring up ones that are closest to you.

Ask Human Resources

Ask your HR representative if mental health services are offered at or by the workplace. Many companies have Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs) available to the staff at no cost.

School Program

If you or your child are in school, check into the counseling services they may offer. If they do not offer services, ask the department to provide you with a list of therapists they recommend.

Look Online

Search free websites such as PsychologyToday.com for therapists in your area. On sites like this, you can search for specialty, insurance they accept, ages of clients they see, their gender, and other information that can help you narrow down the list of potential therapists.

You can also do a web search of “Therapists who help with (insert need here) in (insert your local area)”. For example, you could write “Therapists in Los Angeles”, “Therapy for depression near me”, or “Therapy for anxiety near me”. This will bring up websites for providers who may meet your criteria.

If you are looking for support around a certain concern (i.e. depression, anxiety, domestic violence, substance use, or eating disorders), look up words like “(insert need here) organizations” or “(insert need here) resources”. For example, you would write “substance use resources”. This will bring up credible and trusted websites that can help narrow down searches for information and resources you are looking for.

Social Media

I hesitate to put social media on here, as it is not considered a verified and reputable source of information.

Social media is not a substitute for therapy.

However, there are many providers today who recognize that our clients are on social media and may be using that platform to find a therapist. Social Workers pride themselves on “meeting the clients where they are”. In an age of social distancing, this is where they are spending their time.

Do not look at the number of “likes”, follows, or how pretty their information looks. The number of likes a therapist has on social media has nothing to do with the quality of therapy they can offer.

If you find a practice on social media, I highly encourage you to do your research on the therapist and their business to verify their credentials and expertise.

How do I pick the right therapist for me?

So now that you have done your search and have found a list of therapists, it is time to narrow down the list of potential providers to contact.

Research consistently shows that aside from the importance of the client’s motivation, the therapeutic alliance (professional relationship between the therapist and client) is one of the most important elements of a successful outcome from therapy. Having a good fit with your therapist is the secret sauce to helping you reach your goals for therapy!

A therapist can have all the skills and tools, highest education, decades of experience, and profound metaphors at her disposal. Yet none of this matters if you don’t trust her. The therapeutic alliance develops over time and is created through shared goals, connection, and respect for one another.

Ask Them Questions

You should request to have a consultation call with a therapist you might be interested in working with before starting therapy. This gives you the opportunity for both of you to ask questions, get to know one another, and see if you feel comfortable.

Write down a list of questions you have prior to the call. The questions can include practical things like, “Do you offer telehealth sessions?” or “Do you take my insurance?” to deeper questions like, “What training or experience do you have with working with clients who have depression?”

Make sure you check in with yourself both during and after your conversation with the therapist. Ask yourself, “Did they make me feel safe?” “Did they want to try to understand me?” “Do they seem like they have knowledge in the area I’m looking for to help me?”

If you’d like more tips on what to ask, check out my free guide on Getting the Most Out of Your Free Therapy Consultation halfway down my homepage here.

Here are some other things to consider when deciding whether a therapist is a good fit for you.

They Accept Your Insurance

When looking for a therapist, always check to see what insurance they accept. You may find the perfect therapist for you but find that they do not accept your insurance. If this happens, you can always ask what their private pay rate is to see if it is affordable.

Skills & Expertise

Your therapist should be licensed to provide therapy in your state. On their website or professional profile, they should list their education, training, and treatment approaches they utilize.

They should also list what people they are trained to serve using evidence-based practice. This is important because therapy is not a one-size-fits-all deal.

For instance, if you are looking for therapy for your 5-year-old who has been diagnosed with Autism, a therapist who specializes in grief counseling likely would not be the best fit. This does not mean that they would not care, but they likely have not spent as much time researching or getting training on the specific needs and interventions that would benefit your child.

Therapists receive a lot of training and education before they are able to practice—ask them about it! Therapists are more than happy to share and provide you with more information.

Therapist should be getting training to keep them up-to-date with the most current evidence-based practices. Ask them about their ongoing training as well!

Take Your Time

You may find two or three therapists who meet all of the criteria you are looking for. If they have websites, dig deeper. Are they providing telehealth, in-person, or a combination of therapy? Where is the office located? Do they offer appointments that fit your schedule?

Go with Your Gut

When reaching out to a potential therapist or starting in your work with them, listen to what your gut is telling you. Is the therapist listening to you or seem interested in what you have to say?

Your therapist is there to challenge you. The work might not always be easy, but you should always feel like your therapist is a part of your team. Your therapist does not have all the answers and definitely does not have a magic wand, so remember that you are just as critical to the equation as they are in the process.

This may feel like a personal question for some, but I always encourage people to ask whether the therapist has ever had their own therapy. Some therapists may be bashful and not wish to answer, but I strongly believe that the best therapists have been on the other side of the chair and have experienced firsthand what it is like to be a client. This serves several benefits:

• It means that they had/have someone to check in with. They have done the work in their lives so it does not bleed over into their work as a therapist

• They know personally what examples of healthy and unhealthy therapy looks like.

• They know the challenges you have experienced with finding a therapist, navigating insurance and co-pays as a client, etc.

• It gives them a chance to experience different perspectives than what they are used to, which can expand the quality of their work.

After Therapy Has Started

If at any point either you or the therapist find that the professional relationship is not working, have an open and honest discussion with your therapist about what needs to occur. Sometimes, it might be a misunderstanding that can be dealt with in the conversation, but if not it is absolutely acceptable to find another provider who can meet your needs. This happens for a number of reasons and does not mean that the therapist was “bad”, but it could have to do with:

• Losing insurance

• Affording co-pays

• Scheduling conflicts

• Realizing that the issue you thought you were dealing with (such as managing stress), is actually due to something else (traumatic incident) that requires a therapist with a certain skillset

While finding a good therapist may seem challenging, taking the time to find one that fits your needs and is available to support you is important.

Finding the right therapist can make the world of a difference in helping you overcome the challenges that are holding you back.

Your mental health is worth it!

Do you live in Indiana? Are you ready to learn more about my practice and whether we might be a good fit?